Ebe Dancel’s Bawat Daan
I was staring at the four corner of the room where I spent almost 18 hours a day. Diving to the deepest imagination I may have again. Does loneliness is really a choice? Isn’t it weird that someone is happy being alone? Is that a thing? Is it real?
Everytime I go outside to by mochi ice cream at night maybe around 8, i keep on looking at the sky above. Is it real? Is there really another world after earth? Or we are just a city in the real big world. Does mutants exist? Or how to get their x gene so I might be able to fly.
I also thought about witchcraft, is it really a thing? Because we all really want a magic, something that will make us amaze. Or maybe vampires are real, and we can just let them bite us so we can stay alive forever.
Or maybe cancer is really curable. I dream about it last night, well I always want to be someone who can change the world. At this point, i really do want to look for the cure to a certain pandemic who is stealing most of the best things in our life now.
Yeah, call me weird or a dreamer or any bad things you want but one thing for sure, I know why I keep on thinking about this things. Its because I am alone and lonely. Rolling on my bed again n again, making my eyeas tired while focusing on fictionized series or whatsoever.
I let my brain to focus on other things so that I can forgot the reaality. I am too alone to stay focus on what is really happening. I keep on catching my breathe every time I wake up from nightmares I didn’t create.
I was too alone that I started to love off lights than being in the spotlight. Too alone that I started to hate the sound of the raindrops in the roof. Too alone to not connect my reality to the most hated social media account inthe world. I am too alone to notice that I need to live my life even if I dont like anymore.
I hope I can be like everyone who can find happiness in being alone.